I Stream, You Stream Vol. 15

by Patrick Bromley

Your first streaming recommendations of 2017!

Tales of Halloween (2015, dir. Axelle Carolyn, Mike Mendez, et. al.) Visitors to F This Movie! already know that I'm a big fan of this horror anthology, released last year and gathering an embarrassment of riches in contemporary indie horror for a movie that's too much goddamn fun. This movie rewards you for being a horror fan, and while you might not be in Halloween mindset in early January, I think it's the kind of film that's fun all year long. When you're done, you can watch it again with the solo commentary I recorded last year. You're welcome. (Watch on Netflix)

The Long Riders (1980, dir. Walter Hill) One of the very first proper westerns the great Walter Hill ever directed, The Long Riders is nowadays most famous for casting of a bunch of real-life brothers: David, Robert and Keith Carradine, Stacy and James Keach (who also co-wrote and produced), Dennis and Randy Quaid and Christopher and Nicholas Guest. It's a gimmick, sure, but one that I love because of how reality informs the familial connections presented in the movie. The movie is a little overstuffed with characters and subplots, but still offers plenty of Walter Hill greatness and the director's first collaboration with composer Ry Cooder, with whom he would work many more times (Watch on Hulu)

Hunt for the Wilderpeople (2016, dir. Taika Waititi) One of this year's very best comedies has landed on my Top 10 list this week, as well as JB's, Melissa Uhrin's and Erich's. It's really great, and if you haven't seen it yet you now have no excuse. (Watch on Hulu)

Fired Up! (2009, dir. Will Gluck) As stupid teen movies go, this one is pretty smart. That should come as no surprise, as it's written and directed by Will Gluck, who would repeat the same feat to more critical and commercial acclaim with Easy A one year later. Eric Christian Olsen and Nicholas D'Agosto (my wife's college friend!) are both very funny as fast-talking football players who realize that becoming male cheerleaders is a great way to meet girls. The plot is completely predictable and movie relies heavily on familiar teen movie tropes; what makes it worth watching is the interplay between the two leads, who both have clearly studied as the school of early '80s Chevy Chase. I know there are some people who find this movie insufferable, but I like it a lot. (Watch on Crackle)

May (2003, dir. Lucky McKee) The more years go by, the more I'm convinced that May is one of the two or three best horror movies of the 2000s. Lucky McKee, one of my very favorite current directors, wrote and directed this story of a broken girl (Angela Bettis, giving one of my favorite performances in a movie ever) looking for love. There is darkness and weirdness and lots of discomfort and horror, but also beauty and empathy. I can't say enough good things about it, but in case you're not tired of me gushing over the movie you can listen to myself and Adam Riske do more of it on our podcast. (Watch on Shudder)

Apache Woman (1976, dir. Giorgio Mariuzzo) Offbeat Italian western that's more of a love story than anything else between an American soldier (Al Cliver of Zombie fame) and a Native American woman (Clara Hopf). Super low budget and decidedly non-PC, the film actually takes its time and gets us to invest in the romance at the center. It also doesn't really go where you might think. Rudy Maglioni's terrific score helps a lot, which is good because it plays over almost the entire film. Like a lot of titles on Amazon, the quality on this one is a little sketchy (the audio even lapses into the original Italian at points), but if you're at all a fan of spaghetti westerns I think this one is worth a look. (Watch on Amazon Prime Video)

I Stream, You Stream Vol. 14

by Patrick Bromley

Get down and dirty for the New Year!

American Muscle (2014, dir. Ravi Dhar) I have retreated into almost nothing but exploitation films during the last few weeks of the year, maybe to wash out the taste of all the awards bait films I've had to watch in the last month or so or maybe because they skip out on all the bullshit and aim right for the pleasure centers of my brain. They're helping to keep my happy, so I'm not going to fight it. With that in mind, I'm recommending mostly exploitation this week, including this modern-day attempt at an old-school grindhouse revenge flick that is described by on Netflix reviewer as a movie that "feels like a bunch of bouncers and strippers got together and decided to make a movie." I do not disagree with this assessment. This is an ugly, stupid, violent and sexist film that's maybe too concerned with being cool, but which also manages to get to the heart of true exploitation. Plus, you get to see Trent Haaga as a low-level hood, Todd Farmer as the main villain and Robyn Sydney at her most to-die-for. The great Travis Stevens is a producer on this, which is what drew me to it in the first place. (Watch on Netflix)

Terminal Island (1973, dir. Stephanie Rothman) Directed by one of the few great female exploitation directors of the Golden Age, Terminal Island is a legitimately rad prison movie in which a bunch of cons are dumped onto an island (including a young Tom Selleck, playing An Innocent Man) and battle one another for supremacy. Everything about this movie kicks ass, from the performances to the violence to the scene in which a woman seduces one of her enemies and proceeds to smear honey all over his crotch and butt before releasing a bunch of bees on him. It's awesome, like this movie. (Watch on Exploitation.tv)

God Told Me To (1975, dir. Larry Cohen) I only saw this movie a year or so ago thanks to Elric Kane convincing Blue Underground owner Bill Lustig to put it out on Blu-ray. It's probably Larry Cohen's weirdest movie, but also maybe his best. It's about a New York cop investigating a series of murders committed by seemingly random people (including Andy Kaufman in a small role) who all mutter the same phrase after committing these heinous acts. Where it goes from there I won't even begin to explain, because one of the incredible things about this movie is where it ends up versus where it starts. Like most Larry Cohen films, there's no predicting this one. (Watch on Shudder)

Hell Comes to Frogtown (1988, dir. Donald Jackson, R.J. Kizer) I wrote a whole piece about this movie a couple of years back, and while it's no They Live, it's still the second best movie his Rowdiness Roddy Piper (RIP) ever made. It's a crazy movie that knows it's crazy, presenting an original vision of the apocalyptic future and Roddy Piper mugging like crazy. This was the movie I wanted to see on USA Up All Night more than any other growing up and it took me three tries (I fell asleep before it aired the first two times, and I cannot begin to describe the heartbreak I felt upon waking up and realizing I missed it) before I finally caught up with it. I actually think it gets better with age. It's super entertaining. (Watch on Hulu)

Neon Maniacs (1986, dir. Joseph Mangine) I have been wanting to get Code Red's Blu-ray of this one for a long time but haven't yet (belated Christmas gift, anyone? fthismoviepodcast@gmail.com), so for now I'll settle for watching it on Shout Factory TV -- which, unlike these other platforms, requires no subscription and can be watched totally for free. This is basically an '80s slasher movie but with weird monsters doing the slashing; the fact that it never got a sequel is baffling, because the monsters are cool enough to inspire their own franchise. (Watch on Shout Factory TV)

Black Dragon's Revenge (1975, dir. Tommy Loo Chung) Watching Death Machines this week (which everyone should totally see) led me to Ron Van Clief, the original Black Dynamite and a super cool action star who is also not a great actor. This sequel to his breakout hit The Black Dragon is in shockingly poor taste, as he and a friend are hired by a wealthy businessman to investigate the actual death of the actual Bruce Lee (at one point they hold up actual autopsy photos). But, of course, that's one of the things I love about these exploitation movies -- they either don't know or don't care where the line is and just go ahead and do whatever the fuck they want. Amazon Prime Video has a spotty track record when it comes to the transfers on some of these off-the-radar titles, but Black Dragon's Revenge looks terrific. This is one of my favorite film discoveries of the year, so I'm happy to have gotten it in just under the wire. Here's to more exploitation in 2017! (Watch on Amazon Prime Video)

I Stream, You Stream Vol. 13

by Patrick Bromley

Tired of the same old holiday movies? Here are some alternatives to the usual alternative Christmas movie picks for you to stream this weekend!

Uncle Nick (2015, dir. Chris Kasick) Sometimes a great cast can redeem material that's just ok. Case in point: Uncle Nick, a dark comedy from director Chris Kasick that finds black sheep Brian Posehn spending Christmas with his family and burning everything to the ground with his awfulness. Or maybe he's just being honest? There's not much in Uncle Nick that hasn't been covered by a dozen other similar comedies, but Posehn and his fellow cast mates (including Scott Adsit, Missi Pyle, Melia Renee and the incomparable Paget Brewster) elevate every scene. Plus, there's just enough truthful observation about human behavior that it's possible to overlook some of the more unlikely beats. (Watch on Netflix)

Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale (2009, dir. Jalmari Helander) This Finnish import (#youseewhatIdidthere) is one of the very best Christmas horror movies ever made, even though the actual "horror" elements are downplayed and don't really present themselves until about an hour into the 80-minute runtime. It's all about the atmosphere and the sense of cold and the mythological angle director Helander takes; it's fun to see a fairy tale about Santa Clause told from the perspective of another country and culture. Shudder offers a couple of other Christmas horror movies, too, including Black Christmas and the Spanish-produced The Christmas Tale, which I hope to watch in the next few days.  (Watch on Shudder)

White Reindeer (2013, dir. Zack Clark) Here's a comedy-drama much more in the vein of Uncle Nick than, say, Christmas With the Cranks. Anna Margaret Hollyman totally goes for it as a real estate agent who enters a world of debaucherous sex and drug use after her husband suddenly drops dead. Joe Swanberg has a supporting role, which should give you a sense of what kind of comedy this is. Not for everyone, but I like it. Hollyman's performance alone warrants at least one viewing. Anyone looking for an alternative to the regular "alternatives" like Bad Santa should check it out. (Watch on Hulu)

Wind Chill (2007, dir. Gregory Jacobs) Emily Blunt and Ashton Holmes play college students who team up for a ride share to get home on Christmas Eve but then get trapped in their car during a horrible snowstorm. The setup is terrific and there's a lot of good, atmospheric "what the fuck is going on?" stuff that takes place once they're stuck, but all of it is better than the payoff. This isn't quite a home run, but there is so much good in it that it's the kind of movie you wish was just a little better. Still, some good Christmas content and a really strong (and fairly early) performance from Emily Blunt. (Watch on Crackle)

Happy Naked Christmas (2003, dir. Geon-dong Lee) Truth be told, I've never seen this one. But with a title like that you can bet I will be watching it very soon. (Watch on Amazon Prime Video)

Christmas Evil (1980, dir. Lewis Jackson) Another classic Christmas horror isn't at all what you're expecting, provided you're expecting a variation on Silent Night, Deadly Night. While not nearly as grisly or intense, it's got more of a Henry: Portrait of a Serial Killer vibe in that it's about a guy (Brandon Maggart, father of Fiona Apple) who is lonely and insane and everything is covered in dirt. It's a sadder movie than you would expect, but then gets weird and crazy every once in a while and becomes fun until it gets dark again. It also has one of the greatest endings in all of cinema. One of the very best of the "exploitation" class of Christmas horror. (Watch on Exploitation.TV)

Happy holidays!!

I Stream, You Stream Vol. 11

by Patrick Bromley

More good (and good-adjacent) movies you may have missed this year hit Netflix!

Too Late (2016, dir. Dennis Hauck) The feature debut of writer/director Dennis Hauck is an insanely ambitious, sprawling neo-noir shot on 35mm and constructed of five scenes shot as uninterrupted single takes. It's a gimmick, sure, and one that's more about proving it can be done than it is about serving the story, but I can't help that I enjoy seeing a filmmaker really flex his or her muscles and pull off something really challenging. It's a movie that gets better as it goes along and the story begins to come into focus, bolstered by a characteristically fantastic turn by John Hawkes as a private investigator looking for a missing girl. Some of the dialogue can be a little yeesh but the stuff I like outweighs the stuff I like less. Thanks to Chaybee for talking it up when it was in limited release earlier this year. (Watch on Netflix)

The Frontier (2016, dir. Oren Shai) Another neo-noir, also shot on film, also a first feature from its writer/director. Adam Riske's girlfriend Jocelin Donahue plays a woman on the lam who arrives at the out-of-the-way Frontier hotel/restaurant, where she finds herself in the middle of some shady characters looking to make a big score. In addition to Joc D, this terrific little crime thriller stars A.J. Bowen, Jim Beaver, Kelly Lynch and Liam Aiken. If you're at all a fan of Southern noir like Blood Simple and Red Rock West, this is the movie for you. It's one of the better surprises of the year. I paid to rent it on iTunes just a couple weeks ago, but now you can already watch it for "free" on Netflix! Also, Shock Waves host/friend of the site/all around hero Elric Kane is a producer on this, so we should all show our support. I wouldn't say that if it wasn't really cool movie. (Watch on Netflix)

Yoga Hosers (2016, dir. Kevin Smith) Yeah, yeah, I know. There's literally not one thing you could complain about when it comes to the latest Kevin Smith movie that I wouldn't agree with, but I also feel like everyone involved is having so much fun -- and it's the kind of infectious fun that comes across on screen -- that I can't help but be charmed by it. This is Smith paying tribute to Charles Band and Full Moon, combining it with a movie about teenage girls that seems to actually like teenage girls instead of portraying them as backstabbing or vapid. Smith's daughter, Harley Quinn Smith, and Lily-Rose Depp are both having the time of their lives in this silly ass movie and have an on screen dynamic that's totally winning. Fun is in short fucking supply in 2016, so I'll take it where I can get it (Watch on Netflix)

Inferno (1979, dir. Dario Argento) So it's not one of Argento's best, but I'd put this in his top five for sure. The middle chapter in his "Three Mothers" trilogy makes absolutely no sense (it has something to do with cats, right?), but it's so beautifully lit and shot and full of so many effective set pieces that I I have to love it. I'd argue that this is one of his most underrated efforts, but there are still a few I haven't seen. This is brand new on Shudder. (Watch on Shudder)

Massacre Mafia Style (1974, dir. Duke Mitchell) I'll admit that I canceled my subscription to Exploitation.TV right after #Junesploitation because it offers mostly vintage porn, which I'm not really into. But it does have this wonderful crime opus from Duke Mitchell, an old-school crooner who made a pair of independent movies in the '70s that define "passion project." I strongly recommend reading up on Mitchell and the history of this movie; better yet, buy the Grindhouse Releasing Blu-ray and work through all of the special features. The movie works on its own if you know how to watch stuff like this, but you can appreciate it even more when you know the story behind it. (Watch on Exploitation.TV)

The Wailing (2016, dir. Hong Jin-na) This first came to my attention when I heard it talked about on Shock Waves several months back, then our own Melissa Uhrin has been talking it up for some time now (in particular the performance by Kwak Do-won). I bought a digital copy on Vudu several weeks ago for under $5, but that requires me to remember that I have a Vudu account. Needless to say, it went unwatched. Then it showed up on Netflix this week and I finally caught up with the movie, which is crazy and completely unpredictable and, at two and a half hours, quite long. There's no predicting where it will go even after its first 90 minutes, which is something not uncommon to Korean cinema. That's one of the things that draws me to it, since that shit will never fly in American movies. I don't love everything in the movie (a trend this week?), but I do love how many different places it's willing to go. Oh, and Melissa is right: Kwak Do-won is awesome. (Watch on Netflix)

I Stream, You Stream Vol. 7

by Patrick Bromley

We now return you to your regularly scheduled weekend streaming recommendations.

Bob Roberts (1992, dir. Tim Robbins) Good political satire is hard to do, and as our American political stage becomes more and more ludicrous, most political satire starts to feel less like criticism and more like forecasting what's to come. Case in point: Tim Robbins' 1992 directorial debut (based on a character he created on Saturday Night Live) Bob Roberts, about a conservative with no political experience running for office by pandering to right-wing ideals in a way that proves to be insidious. There's not an exact 1-to-1 comparison to next week's election, but this weekend still seems like a good time to revisit the acid blackness of Tim Robbins' mockumentary. It's messy and doesn't hit all its targets, but it's one of the last really good political satires. (Watch on Netflix)

Sun Choke (2015, dir. Ben Cresciman) I saw and quite liked this indie horror drama at last year's Bruce Campbell Horror Film Festival, but it didn't yet have distribution and took about 12 months until it was finally released without a ton of fanfare (though Adam Riske did review it for the site). I'm still not 100% positive I get the whole thing, but I think I do? Regardless, it's beautifully made and features two fantastic performance from Sarah Hagan and Barbara Crampton (friend of the podcast! I love her!...in those movies), playing totally against type and doing what I think is maybe the best work she's ever done. Yes, Scary Movie Month is over, but this one still deserves your attention. (Watch on Netflix)

The Fits (2016, dir. Anna Rose Holmer) This played at the Chicago Critics Film Festival earlier this year. It's so good. Like Sun Choke, I'm not positive that I get it, but I think I do? Royalty Hightower plays a young boxer in training who wants to join her school's prestigious dance team, right around the same time that several of the members are experiencing mysterious seizures. Director Anna Rose Holmer's narrative feature debut is a low-budget affair made with total confidence and a willingness to be abstract. I can't wait to see what she does next. (Watch on Amazon Prime Video)

Phantasm: Remastered (1978, dir. Don Coscarelli) The only place to see the new 4K remaster of Phantasm (without paying a separate rental fee) is on Shudder. I saw this screened theatrically a few months back (anyone noticing a trend this week? I swear it's not intentional. #MovieBrag) and it's pretty incredible. I love that J.J. Abrams and Bad Robot took such an interest in the movie after all these years and have restored it so beautifully, leading to not just a limited theatrical run but also an upcoming Blu-ray release after too long a wait. If the rumors are true, I'll wait for the boxed set of all the movies that's supposedly coming soon. (Watch on Shudder)

The Living Daylights (1987, dir. John Glen) Sure, Hulu may be losing its library of Criterion titles to the newly-launched FilmStruck, but they're easing the sting with the addition of all the Bond movies. Start here with one of my absolute favorites -- some days I'd put it at #2 or 3, though lately it seems more like #1 -- in which Gentleman T. Dalts makes his debut as Bond and crushes it no matter what Mike says. This is the Bond movie to which I feel like returning most often and inspired one of my favorite episodes of our podcast. I love it a lot. (Watch on Hulu)